LeaderShape DFW 08

The Chronicles of LeaderShape


"Saturday, December 13, 2008

First day of Leadershape. I guess that I don't really have many expectations for this conference since I've never been to a secular leadeship conference before. The only leadership trainings that I have gone through have been based on God and His principles. It will be a difference experience to go through a leadersip training from a secular point of view.

Will they tell me to rely on myself and my own strength all the time? I'm interested to see what it may be like and what God will teach me through this experience.



Sunday, December 14, 2008

Today has been a good and long day. It's only been a day, but I feel like I've already been here with this group for a week. I love our family cluster small group that we can open up in and have deep conversations with.

Team Challenge Ropes Course wasn't as physical and challenging as I would have liked, but it was a great opportunity to see leaders in action. It definately brought out aspects of people that show what areas need work. When you get a group of leaders together and give them a task, be ready to let the sparks fly. There were about 6 macho guys in my group who were all outspoken, dominating leaders who tried to tell everyone else what to do. There were too many people talking and not enough people listening. Sometimes leaders need to learn when t just be quiet and let other people lead so that the team can get something done.

Watched the sunset over the lake. It was beautiful.

I’ve been having some good conversations with different people. Even if I may not influence them or change their views, I know that God has brought all this together for a reason, whether to plant a seed or just to get me to pray for them.

Dear God,
I pray for these certain people that you have laid on my heart. I think you for the opportunities that you have given me to interact with them and listen to them tell their stories. I pray that you would show them your love and send your Holy Spirit to convict them that they need you. Thank you for loving them.
Love, Me.



Monday, December 15, 2008

Morning session was about building balloon castles. Lesson learned from that activity was that you can’t combine once you’ve already started building from your own visions unless the group comes together and creates a new vision as a team. When we tried to take what we built from our separate individual visions and mesh it together, all we got was a big blob and wasted resources.

In family clusters we wrote out what we’re passionate about and what we want to build for the future.

Lesson learned from chaos and change was that leaders need to be working alongside the team in order for the team to feel like the leader can relate to them and for the team to accept feedback. Also, even if you ask for feedback, the environment might not be one that is conducive to open comments and voices may be silenced.

We had to take our passions and future goals and turn them into a vision statement. This was really hard for me to do because the vision statement had to be a really broad statement about the future end result of my work.

My life revolves around loving and serving God and furthering His kingdom. For me, life is all about God. God’s plan for me is to further His kingdom because He tells us to be His witnesses throughout the world and to make disciples of all nations. My vision is to follow that commend.

But when I wrote my statement, I couldn’t say that my end goal is to “convert everyone to my religion” because that is as offensive as it is false, so I ended up writing something really vague.

We had to put them on the wall and go around and comment on everyone’s vision statement. I was really frustrated about the results of this activity because I feel like I censured myself. What I wrote didn’t explain exactly what I want to do, but I feel like I couldn’t write how I truly felt because my real passion is to love God and serve Him only."


After that, it got so busy that I didn't find time to journal...

LeaderShape was an amazing experience. Although I didn’t learn a lot of book knowledge, the practical challenges, experiences, and simulations showed me a lot. I discovered aspects of myself that I did not know before, and I learned what kind of leadership works in certain situations and what kind is destined for disaster. I learned a lot about interpersonal relationships and how to communicate effectively with different people. I thoroughly enjoyed my experience at LeaderShape. It was a whole lot of fun, and I think it was definitely worth it.

Fireproof

I just finished watching FIREPROOF. I've been wanting to see it for so long, and I finally got to see it. I was not disappointed. I loved that movie!

I'm currently still overwhelmed by the emotion/message of the movie so that I can't analyze it and critique it properly. I'm hoping to see it again soon, so when I do, I'll be able to reflect on it more.

For now, I'll just say that I LOVED FIREPROOF!

Prayer for My (Future) Guy

Dear God,

I know that he's out there. You've made a perfect guy for me, and You're working on getting him ready for a life dedicated to serving You. And I trust that once You've got him ready to serve you and You've got me ready to serve You, then You'll bring us together so that we can serve You even better as a team.

God, I know that Your timing is best. And I ask that You would keep him (whoever he is and where ever he may be) steadfast on You. I pray that You would continue to mature him to be the leader and servant that You have planned for him to be. I ask that You would keep him safe from all that may tear him down and distract him from You.

God, I pray for me. You know how much I long to belong, to love, and to be loved. Please help me to stay focused on Your plan for me at this moment. Help me to love You above all else. Give me joy and fulfilment through You alone.

There are so many shiny things out there to distract me. So many nice guys and cute faces. I know they're not the one for me, but yet I still fall for them anyways. In a way, I'm glad that this semester is over, because I will probably never see these guys again. One will be heading off to medical school soon, and the other one will be gone at another school on the other side of the country. I guess that's goodbye to them, until we meet again in Heaven some day.

God, I know that You have someone better for me. And I know that when the time is right, he'll show up. So until then, I pray that You would keep me steadfast on You. I pray that You would keep me and him focused on what You have for us to do right now, so that when we do meet, we will be ready for the job that You have for us to do as a team.

Love Always,
Your Daughter

TMJ Doctor

So the TMJ (Temporal Mandibular Joint) Doctor says that the reason why I have pain in my jaw is because my central nervous system doesn't tell my jaw to relax when my muscles tense up at night.

Some big percentage (I think he said 60%) of people clench some muscles when they sleep at night. Most of these people never have problems because their central nervous system adapts to that and knows when to tell the body to stop and relax.

I never had jaw pain until after I got my braces off. The doctor said that since the braces moved my teeth around, the places where my teeth touch when I close my mouth are different. The central nervous system is now confused, so it doesn't know when to tell my jaw to relax. As a result, my jaw clenches when I sleep, so the muscles get really tight and lock up my jaw. The pain, popping, and tightness are all caused by my muscles over exerting themselves at night.

The solution? A simple orthodic (mouth guard) that sits on my teeth like a retainer. There is a piece of acrylic that touches my front teeth whenever I close my jaw. Since the nerves on my front teeth are denser than they are on my back teeth, this sends a lot of signals to my central nervous system to tell the muscles to back off and relax.

I've been wearing this orthodic when I sleep for a little more than a week, and it is amazing! The first morning when I woke up, I opened my mouth and there was no pain or tightness at all. I felt like I had never had TMJ pain in my life. As the day progressed, my pain returned, but every day since it has been getting better and better.

I love the feeling NOT being in pain. I feel so good!

But what I don't love is the doctors bill...for the visit and the orthodic: $2,575.

Grades

So my first semester of University is officially over. Exams are done. Grades are out!

My grades:
Chem-Withdraw
Chem Lab-Withdraw
Rock climbing-Pass
BIO 1401-A
CTV 1301-A
MATH 1304-A
MSA 1350-A

Which gives me a 4.0. I am so relieved. God has been good to me this semester.

But Dad is right. Although my grades this semester have been good, my spiritual life has been going downhill. I have slowly been neglecting my devos and quiet times. I have not been reading my bible every day and spending special time with God. I have not been faithful in putting God always first in my life.

I've gotten busy with studies, friends, and having fun. I've forgotten my first love. I need to come back and put God first again.

New Classic

I watched ANOTHER CINDERELLA STORY again. Everytime I watch it, it makes me want to dance. I really like the song: New Classic.

New Classic by Drew Seeley
"It's Become So Hard
For Me To Be Surprised
You're Bringing Back The Real Me
No Judgment In Your Eyes
Cause When I Dance With You
It's How I Speak The Truth
Just Classic When Me Met
Now You Make Me New

Ever Try To Reach For Something
But Its Someone Else's Dream
Every Step That You Take Forward
It Takes You Right Back Where You Been
And Then When You Least Expect It
And You Tried About Everything
Somebody Hears Your Opinions
Somebody Cares What You See
You Woke Me Up
No Longer Tired
With You I Feel Inspired
You Help Me Find My Fire

You're The New Classic
You're The New PYT
Stands For Pay Young
Taking On The World From The Driver's Seat
You Look So Classic
Fantastic
When You're On That Floor
Bring The Beat Back Once More
Let Me See You Do That

Tryin' to do it right
No rehearsal, it's your life
When you're doing this crazy dance
Cuz you're makin these crazy plans

It's just a dance, not a test
You put in work to be the best (oh)
It's a classic take on a brand new game
Before the needle drops, they're gonna know your name
When it gets old don't lose the love
You're cold I'll warm you up (you up)
Your fire's hot enough, enough, enough, enough, enough

It's Become So Hard
For Me To Be Surprised
You're Bringing Back The Real Me
No Judgment In Your Eyes
Cause When I Dance With You
It's How I Speak The Truth
Just Classic When Me Met
Now You Make Me New"